The books i gave to her out of affection are torn

I gave her the books out of my affection for her
Red leather bound, vintage
Musty, old
But in such good condition like yours truly
I smile when I recall her look of amazement when I gave them to her
At one time I thought she was attracted to me
But like a cold sweet morning mist her favor that held so much promise has vanished
And I feel the searing heat of the a midday's indifference.

I asked her about the books the other day
and her reply was that she was with her boyfriend!

! The Fuck.

any other reply would have been more preferable
Much more.
Fucking anything

Like...
"I'm sorry I haven't had the time to read them yet"
"Yes they were really nice but I'm awfully busy am have only read a page or too"

or "Sorry no time lah, sweetie"

even a cool ambiguous reply would have suffice, " Yeah, later dude"

Tell me some sweet lie
or simple dead silence

Silence would have been preferable
then I can guess and wait
I can imagine

Is it wrong to feel this way?
to feel the need to be loved or cherished?
to be held in affection?

But if at a door I see a lady approach
I will open it for her and perform the courtesies.


I should know if I wanted appreciation or applause I should have joined the circus.